{"id":85432,"date":"2020-10-16T12:42:50","date_gmt":"2020-10-16T11:42:50","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/centmagazine.co.uk\/?p=85432"},"modified":"2020-10-20T13:18:28","modified_gmt":"2020-10-20T12:18:28","slug":"home-grown","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/?p=85432","title":{"rendered":"Home Grown"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">On moonlit nights, when the office was closed and nobody was left in the building except the security guard, and the Boardroom blinds were left down, but open, the pale white lines of moon-light would wash the polished wooden surface of the long table in a ghostly sheen. In the mornings, when Sir George held his meetings, neat squares of white paper, each with an accompanying dark pencil by its side, might seem to have gathered up that white light and converted it into something useful, but of course, they had not.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-right has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">Images <a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" href=\"http:\/\/lauravesmare.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Laura Vesmare<\/a> Instagram pics_of_laura <a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" href=\"http:\/\/lauravesmare.com\" target=\"_blank\"> <\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"580\" height=\"870\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/home-grown-2.jpg?resize=580%2C870&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-86647\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/home-grown-2.jpg?w=682&amp;ssl=1 682w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/home-grown-2.jpg?resize=200%2C300&amp;ssl=1 200w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 580px) 100vw, 580px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">Waystrel Gubbins pulled uncomfortably at his shirt collar in a hopeless attempt to loosen his tie. He was the only man in the room not wearing a dark suit. He was the only <em>person<\/em> in the room not wearing a dark suit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Sam cleared her throat.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present the man who is going to guarantee all our pensions, Mr. Waystrel Gubbins.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Martin, also from marketing, grimaced, and began to think that perhaps an upward move within the company might be possible after all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Sandra not quite imperceptibly wrinkled her nostrils.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Ben Weiner looked interested. Sir George looked bored. Orfen, as usual, remained impassive.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Get on with it Sam, Sir George said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Certainly, sir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; With deft precision Sam hoisted a slim briefcase to the table top, flipped open the catches and lifted the lid. Seven pale and wrinkled ovoids lay inside. Each was connected, on alternate sides to a vine like stem, by a wizened dark green stalk. She lifted them out and laid them on the white oblong of the notepad in front of her. She closed the briefcase and returned it to the floor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"580\" height=\"870\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/LV_20201012_0002.jpg?resize=580%2C870&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-86648\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/LV_20201012_0002.jpg?w=682&amp;ssl=1 682w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/LV_20201012_0002.jpg?resize=200%2C300&amp;ssl=1 200w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 580px) 100vw, 580px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">Sickly pink and with a slight gloss on their fissured skins, each was the size, but not quite the shape of a table tennis ball. They looked like glands that had suffered some rare, wasting disease. With a show-woman\u2019s flourish Sam lifted the stem by its tail, and held it up, like the corpse of an other-worldly life form. Then, one by one, she broke off each small, wrinkled ovoid. There was a look on her face, not quite smug, but certainly amused. She had the confidence of someone who knows that they are on the cusp of undoubted success.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Waystrel Gubbins fidgeted with his tie again and glanced from face to face around the table. &nbsp;Sam, ignoring him, rose to her feet, and leaning over, began to hand out the oval, desiccated fruits, one to each of them. She then produced a small folding knife, snapped it open, and cut a thin slice from the ovoid that she still held in her hand. She passed the knife to Sandra with a twisted smile on her face.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; They are, in fact, tomatoes, she said. Please, ladies and gentlemen, take a piece, eat, and tell me what you think.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Her own slice she set gently upon the blotter before her as she sat down. The seventh tomato she placed, whole, on Waystrel Gubbin\u2019s blotter. She sat back, almost lazily, and looked at the others who, one by one, as the knife travelled around the board room table, were cutting and eating their own segments.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; That\u2019s amazing, Sandra said. It tastes of banana.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Oranges, you mean, Martin said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Ben Weiner narrowed his eyes and leaned forward, his own uneaten slice between his fingers. It\u2019s hallucinogenic. Am I right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Oh no, sir, I ain\u2019t done nothing like that to it, Waystrel Gubbins said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Did you say Orange? Orfen asked. I\u2019m getting strawberry, a strong flavour of strawberry.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Sir George said nothing, but chewed reflectively. Whatever flavours they were finding, his ovoid most definitely tasted of eighteen year old malt whisky, The Macallan, if he was not mistaken.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"580\" height=\"870\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/LV_20201012_0004.jpg?resize=580%2C870&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-86649\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/LV_20201012_0004.jpg?w=682&amp;ssl=1 682w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/LV_20201012_0004.jpg?resize=200%2C300&amp;ssl=1 200w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 580px) 100vw, 580px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Ben Weiner popped his own piece into his mouth, and an expression of surprise passed across his face. Remarkable, he said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Sandra reached across for the knife, and began to cut a second slice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; No, Sam said, lurching forward. I mean, I\u2019d rather we talked a little first before we take a second morsel. Getting them used to the initial effect would do for the time being, she thought. What would come later, well, she still hadn\u2019t got her own head around that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; She turned to face Waystrel Gubbins. Would you like to talk a little about the fruit, Mr.Gubbins?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Well, yes, thank you miss. He tried a little bob of a bow in his chair, thought about getting up to do a proper one, thought better of it, played with his tie again, and finally blurted out. There ain\u2019t nothing special about the tomatoes themselves, no more than any of the other fruit and vegetables we grow. It\u2019s what we do to them after makes all the difference.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; My God, Martin said, pushing the tomato away from him. This has been spiked with narcotics, hasn\u2019t it? We can\u2019t go down that road, can we Sir George? At last, that jumped up little prick, Sam, has gone too far, he thought.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Oh no, indeed it\u2019s not, sir. No drugs. No genetic funny business. neither \u2018Tis all natural, and organic. To be quite frank I\u2019m surprised no-one else has come up with it. We\u2019ve known about it in our family for three generations now, but have kept it quiet, and to ourselves, but Mrs. Gubbins, well, and myself, with it being like, and thinking perhaps there might be, and what with us. You\u2019ll kick yourselves when I tell you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Tell us what, Mr.Gubbins?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Well, how we get them to go that way, your Lordship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Orfen coughed discreetly and lifted his tomato, like Hamlet with the skull. I should sound a note of caution here, Sir George, before we set off down the road of novelty fruits. The market is difficult at the moment, but not so difficult that we have to take entirely desperate measures.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Time for a second slice, I think, Sam said. Please, Sandra, start us off.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Sandra cut another slice, and put it into her mouth. Almost immediately she turned a cherry pink, chewed tentatively and looked at the remaining slice in astonishment. Oh my gosh!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Sir George waved a hand. Get her a drink Orfen, she\u2019s overheating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Is this entirely safe, Sam? Martin demanded. You\u2019ve had it tested for toxins I presume?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Ben Weiner was looking amused. I think you may have got what I got the first time, he said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Are you all right, my dear? Sir George looked concerned. Beneath that tough exterior, everyone knew he was a big softy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Sandra looked flushed, breathless even. Her eyes had suddenly taken on quite a sparkling sheen. She ran a hand through her hair, and breathed out heavily. Oh, yes, Sir George. I\u2019m, marvellous. She lifted the last piece in her hand and seemed about to eat it, but then changed her mind. I think I\u2019ll finish it later, she said. Waystrel Gubbins, who had not touched his tomato, without turning his head discreetly slid the small fruit from his blank paper, pushed it across the polished wood of the table and onto hers. She deftly covered it with a palm, and slipped it into her pocket.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"580\" height=\"870\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/LV_20201012_0005.jpg?resize=580%2C870&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-86650\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/LV_20201012_0005.jpg?w=682&amp;ssl=1 682w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/LV_20201012_0005.jpg?resize=200%2C300&amp;ssl=1 200w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 580px) 100vw, 580px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; The others looked at each other. Sam smirked. It\u2019ll sell by the million, she said quietly. It\u2019ll sell by the tens of millions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Orfen tentatively bit into his second slice. Lines appeared down his cheeks. He closed his eyes. A muscle twitched. A pulse hammered at his temple. He opened his eyes again, and stared straight down the table, keeping his face expressionless, with difficulty. I see, he said eventually.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Waystrel Gubbins felt himself relax, as he always did when somebody new tried it. There never had been a failure yet. There wasn\u2019t anybody, so far as he knew, who was not susceptible. Not that they had shared it with that many people, not in his grandfather\u2019s generation, not in his father\u2019s, not in his, up until now, not even relatives. Oh, they had put some out among the crisps and peanuts at the odd family get together, banking on people thinking it was the drink. But, what with having no kids, and them not getting any younger, Mrs.Gubbins and him, they had decided that the time had come to get more than just the usual value out of grandfather Gubbins\u2019 discovery.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; It do pick up on whatever you\u2019re fancying at the moment, Waystel Gubbins explained.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Bloody Hell! Martin said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Mr. Gubbins is suggesting, Sam said into the silence, that we give him an awful lot of money, for the rest of his life, and he\u2019ll tell us how it\u2019s done.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Sir George covered his right hand, fearful that he might reach for his chequebook there and then.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Waystrel Gubbins was the only man in the room wearing a suit. He was the only <em>person<\/em> in the room wearing a suit. He had gone out and had it specially made, tailor made. It fitted him like the air. The tailor had said that it would.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Sir George waved a large cigar at him and smiled soporifically. Martin and Sam were arm in arm at the bar. Orfen was laughing at something Bein Weiner had said. Sandra was sitting by herself, gazing wistfully out of the window at the star splintered night sky. The moon blazed down its reflected light. An open packet of Moonshine Tomatoes lay beside her. Two were already missing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; The launch of the Moonshine range had gone well, unbelievably well. Well, perhaps not unbelievably, considering. Only problem is, Waystrel Gubbins had said, you can only do it on a clear night and with a full moon. Who would have thought it, Sir George said, Moon Dried Tomatoes, The Taste of Your Dreams.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Waystrel Gubbins held a finger to his lips. Sh! Once it gets out, and they realise that any fool can do it. Then where will we be?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Sorry, Waystrel, silly of me. Mum\u2019s the word, Sir George said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; But he was already thinking that so long as he could do it too, it really didn\u2019t matter any more.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-right has-secondary-color has-text-color wp-block-paragraph\">If you enjoyed reading <em>Home Grown <\/em>then why not read <a href=\"https:\/\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/funny-little-creatures\/\" data-type=\"URL\" data-id=\"https:\/\/staging.centmagazine.co.uk\/funny-little-creatures\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Lovely Little Creatures Here<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>On moonlit nights, when the office was closed and nobody was left in the building except the security guard, and&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":193,"featured_media":86653,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"features_issues":[],"featured_themes":[15169],"ppma_author":[16714],"class_list":["post-85432","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-literature","featured_themes-border"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ 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